1999: I waved to all the cars, buses and lorries on the way, to Edons today and not one of them waved back, I didn’t think that was a very good start to the day. It was quiet today, as it’s half term, so no Jake or Josh, but Lea and Dan were there. I didn’t want mum to go this morning and this evening I came running out to meet her. There was an Easter egg in the back of the car, which I spied straight away, and ended up eating it all but still ate my tea (which I feel was a good move on my part) Played in the garden, watched some of Simbas Pride with mum after my bath, and was in bed and asleep by 8.00. Not a very eventful day, but the chocolate was good!
2019: I clearly used to love chocolate. Still like my sweets but chocolate is one of my worst “go through me” intakes. But then most foods do and I’m either eating for England or not at all. Got caught short in Tesco the other day and had to run (luckily pre ankle injury!). I followed the toilet signs only to come across a large rail of clothing blocking my path. I had to run all the way round another two aisles and came to the disabled loo first with a big sign “Not all disabilities are visible”. Phew! I went in, pulled everything down and sat on the throne just in time to do a big “Crohn’s let rip”. Relief. Bugger. There was no bloody toilet roll. So ensued 10 minutes of trying to get Zofs attention by text (who is usually glued to her phone) and eventually she responded, found me loo roll and deposited it to me in the disabled loo. No need to text to get her attention today as we are glued together, at Stansted and on our way to Budapest. Lets Party!
#holidays #budapest #stansted #flying #crohns #IBD #IBS #tescos #shopping #eating #sweets #chocolte #eastereggs #toddlers #growingup #childminders
1999: Early start today. Awake at 6.30 when mum bought my milk in! Is she feeling all right? It’s a bit on the early side and she did it all on her own. I held my own inhaler and spacer unit this morning, something I’ve started doing over the past week. Why does it take big people so long to realise that we will happily do things, if only they’d let us get on with it? I tried to play with my racing cars this morning but they wouldn’t work. Mum had a look at it and then blamed me accusing me of leaving the battery on which I felt was mighty unfair and so I had a look and I managed to get it going. When mum picked me up tonight we went home via the shops and I chose Jelly Tots and went running up to mum. Oh, was that not the reason we were here then? Apparently not – it was to collect a paper for Nan! She gave in. I’m just far too cute, but it’s definitely for my own good! Whilst she was paying I went for a wander. Mum found me in the cake section drooling over the iced buns; she seemed rather relieved that she reached me at that point; personally I found it quite disappointing. No milk tonight because mum forgot to buy any – even though we’d just been to the shop!. We’ve only just been to the shops! It’s typical, I really don’t know what she does with her day, or her memory come to that. Tired, milkless and asleep by 8.00
2019: Well mum hasn’t changed over the years and neither have I really. Still love my milk, although I know it probably makes my Crohn’s worse, along with gluten, but my motto is “You’re here for a good time, not a long time”. Death really doesn’t bother me but dying of boredom and restriction does. That’s not the depressed or morbid side of me talking, I’ve looked death in the eye with sepsis. I wasn’t scared – I was too delirious to know or feel anything – but I did make up my mind afterwards to live. And food is my passion so I’m gonna enjoy it. I’ve long grown out of asthma – 7 years ago but it stopped me enlisting for the army at 16 as had to be 3 years clear, and then Crohn’s came along …
#crohns #autoimmune #depression #positiveliving #food #milk #asthma #growing up
1999: When I got up I was full of beans and I got mum to join in my antics too (even though we were running late). I found the headphones for mum’s walkman and sang into the connector piece (as usual) and today I did it on my very own stage – mum’s flat packed wardrobes which are on the floor waiting to be put up. I wish she’d hurry up and do it, my room’s still full of all her clothes (and I thought I had a lot!) Told mummy that I’d had a good day at Edons but I refused to put my shoes and socks on tonight so mum had to carry me to the new, shiny red car. I love it! Mum’s bought a smelly for it, but I didn’t care for that much, it smelt far better than it tasted. When we got home I found ice-lollies in the freezer which mum made me eat in the kitchen (I can’t think why). The phone went tonight before, during and after tea – Dev, Eesa, Nan, Karen and Tracey! Mum and I cuddled on the settee but she put me to bed at 7.45 as she thought I was tired and miserable. I thought I’d been trying to communicate! I was asleep within 10 minutes – perhaps she was right, but I won’t tell she knows best.
2019: Communication’s not my best thing currently. Low mood and arguments. Got an email to advise I did not get short listed for mental health support worker role I applied for – but at least they bothered to email me. My grumpiness when tired and hungry has continued into adult life but not working definitely makes everything 10 times worse. Self esteem is taking nose dive as is my Crohn’s
#depression #self-esteem #crohns #autoimmune #work #humour #growing up
1999: Slept the whole night in my own bed, I must be slacking, will have to do better than that tonight. Before we left for Edon’s today, I spied a big tube of Smarties, which someone had apparently dropped round for me last night. What a treat, I’m not usually allowed, but I’ve seen them now mum – you should have hidden them sooner (I mean you had all night). Meanie head said that I couldn’t have them for breakfast, so I decided to take them with me. I put them on the dashboard and guzzled my drink. Mum tried all sorts of distractions, but I know her game, she was hoping I would forget they were there. Is she stupid? I mean she’d remember her sweeties so what makes her think I wouldn’t remember mine? I humoured her, responded to her distractive ramblings and once at Edon’s got out of the car, Smarties tightly clenched in hand.
2019: Well mums away in Tenerife and I’ve been working hard all day and grabbing what I can to snack on. To be fair, I love my sweets still, but know chocolate really effects my Chron’s so I tend to avoid this. Along with spicy food and nuts – so what did mum put in my Christmas sack – Wasabi bloomin nuts!
Thud. Thud. Thud. Awoke to footsteps on the floorboards at 6.15 a.m. Some people are so inconsiderate, don’t they realise I had a late night? On further investigation they turned out to be mine, as I found myself on automatic pilot to mummy’s room and bed, whereupon we snuggled back down until 8.00. Just as we were about to get up we heard a downpour. It was the first time mum has ever been glad to see rain as it meant she got an extra 5 minutes in bed whilst I watched the rain from her bedroom window. Mum reckons I’m a bit whiney today and says that it’s not the best of days to be like this as she’s quit smoking. What that’s got to do with anything I don’t know. Anyway if anyone’s being moody and miserable today it’s her, not me. Women! We went over the town and I wanted a bacon roll from the burger van. Mummy only ordered one and told the man that I would only have a bite and that she would have to eat the rest. He said that one day I would call her bluff and eat it all. What a marvellous idea (don’t know why I didn’t think of it before). So 10 minutes later we were back at the burger van ordering mummy’s bacon roll. That will teach her to be so presumptuous. We went to see Aunty ‘Eesa’ and I played with ‘Dandell’ and ‘Dessica’ for a while. We left at 2.30, which I think was way too early, now all I have to look forwards to is a boring afternoon of mummy. So I fell asleep in the car and continued to sleep through the transfer to the settee and finally decided to wake up to mum’s prompts just in time for tea. Well – I had to give in, it was Yorkshire Pud’s. I finished my Yorkshires and hadn’t even started the rest, when I spotted the Jelly Babies. I pushed the rest of my dinner away opting for the sweets. Unfortunately mum had other ideas. My dinner is now in the bin and the Jelly Babies remain, untouched, in the pot. She’s not completely mean though; I did get a mince pie. Another day of well balanced diet – sugar and fat – great if you’re nearly two, not so great if the Health Visitor finds out.
Mum popped into Lidl to get a few bits but ended up filling the trolley so much she had to ring me to go and meet her . I had to jump in the car and go help with the packing and loading and I then came home and cooked dinner using some of my new Christmas cookware. I still love my sweets and mince pies but love to whip up different culinary concoctions with herbs and spices. Have discovered I have to hold back a bit on the latter though as it effects my Chron’s – although I’ve been a lot better since surgery last year. I love to cook and eat when I can and it’s better than having to keep fanning the smoke detector when mum cooks (plus I don’t have to wash up!)