1999: Gale force winds this morning and mummy thought the tiles were going to blow off the roof. They didn’t, but later we noticed that both the fences in the back garden were down. Mum decided to have a lovely relaxing bath this morning, but I had other ideas. What all that lovely water and bubbles just for one? No way, I’m getting in too. Uncle Eddy was on the TV. last night and mum had taped it for me. I was glued to the telly mimicking him, laughing, clapping and reaching out for a hug and at the end shouting “again, again…Pease”. Our car (which we only got a month ago) has had to have a new engine in it and this morning the man from the garage dropped it round to us. Mummy and I then had to drive him back to the garage. On the way I told mummy that I wanted “ish” and wriggled my fingers. One fish fingers happy meal coming up, complete with Eeyor. I decided to eat out of mum’s filet box, as it was easier. I saved 6 chips and ketchup, I closed the box and took it with me, but as we were leaving the box came open and all fell on the floor. We called in to see Dandell and Dessica for a while and mummy invited them to my party on Thursday. On the way home we went to ASDA to get my party bits including a very expensive Tellytubby cake. Personally I think she’s mad, I wouldn’t have paid that much for it, but if mummy wants to who am I to spoil her fun! When we got home mummy unloaded the car and then came back for me, only to discover that I was minus an L.A light trainer. She says she wouldn’t mind but they were a lot of money and the only reason she bought them was because I was desperate for foot attire and they were the only ones that fitted. She jumped back in the car to return to ASDA for the hunt, but the car wouldn’t start. I sat very, very, quietly. Mummy rang the garage, and the man came out to look at the car only to discover that the choke had been left on and it was flooded! Mummy was so embarrassed, especially as she had had the bonnet up and checked the battery and spark plugs before she called them. It’s the simple things in life mum…
Nanny and Pa came round later with a huge torch. They had been to look in the trolleys and car park at ASDA, in a bid to save my trainer to no avail. Mummy then went out with Pa and I cried and I cried and I cried, until mummy got back. Nanny had tried to console me but all I did was wee all over her. Anyway there was a happy ending; Mum found my trainer in one of the trolleys and Nanny went home to put dry trousers on.
2019: No lost shoes today but I clearly spoke to soon yesterday about not destroying things. Fender bender today in the van taking someone’s front wing with me. Well, he pulled up on my blindside when I was sat waiting to turn right at a junction.
The Way it Really Is - Then and now 